Home Sweet Condo

The last month has been hectic - some of it outside of our control, some of it totally our fault - but the last week has been crazier still. Last minute errands and projects, packing, repacking, weighing bags, rearranging, trying to make sure that we didn't forget anything, and all while Peter continued to work his normal schedule so that he would have as much vacation time to use as possible for the next two months.

The plan was to have everything ready to go on Wednesday by the time he came home from work (he was hoping to leave work around noon), so that we could hit the road no later than 3 pm, putting us in Atlanta around 7:30, with room to spare for dinner and downtime. The reality was that he was home by 10:30, but we spent the next 7.5 hours running around like headless chickens, getting the house ready to leave for the next 6-8 weeks... AND have it presentable for the kids when we return! Beds had to be made (Peter discovered it was easier to take the mattresses off of the bunks to make the beds and then shove them back in!), bathrooms cleaned and winterized, fridge cleaned out, and on and on.

As we were finally pulling out of the driveway around 6 PM, poor Peter looked over from the drivers seat as a sob escaped and the tears start to flow from yours truly. As we drove away from our house, the one thing going through my head was, "I don't want to do this." Even as I thought it, I knew that was just Satan's final dig, his last attempt to use the weakest link (me), to play to all of my fears and appeal to my selfishness. And so yes, I cried, but I also - once again (and not for the last time, I'm quite sure) - said "Yes" to God's plan. Yes to obedience. Yes to discomfort. Yes to hard work and sleepless nights. Sorrowful, yet always rejoicing.

On our way to Atlanta that night, we avoided an idiot in a van who almost clipped our front and the rear of a semi as he squeezed through between us. Peter - who is not prone to exaggeration - even said, "Huh, I'm not sure I've even seen one quite that close. That was within inches." Meanwhile, I was having a heart attack in the right seat, and thanking God for His protection. A little while later, we passed a semi that was STOPPED in the right hand lane (not off on the shoulder, but out in the road), and I thanked God again for His care.

By the time we made it to our airport motel, it was 10:30, and dinner consisted of a bagel for Peter and a couple of cups of hot tea in the room before we set our alarm. Not exactly the relaxing and restful evening we were hoping for, but we were grateful to be there and one step closer to our kids. After tossing and turning all night, we scarfed down the Greek yogurt we'd brought with us from home (see: fridge clean out), and then hit the road again to park our car and catch a ride to the airport. By the time we were at the gate (Pumpkin Spice Mocha in hand for me, Costa Rican coffee for Peter), we were just ready to be in Costa Rica, settling into the condo and finding our way around.

After boarding the plane, we were all settled and ready to push back from the gate when the voice of the captain announced that due to the eruption of more ash from the Turrialba volcano (about 30 miles from the San Jose airport), the airport had been closed and the Delta flight from California that was headed that way had been rerouted, so we were staying on the ground in Atlanta for at least 1 hour while we waited to see if it would reopen. Let the prayers commence. Those who wanted to disembark could do so, those who wished to remain (like us) could stay. After waiting out the hour, around 11:00 the decision was made to take off as the airport had been cleared of the ash, and the winds had switched direction... and with that, we were on our way.

The flight was a little bumpy, but basically uneventful. I shocked our seatmate (an elderly man who moved to Costa Rica with his wife a year ago, and was going back down to close things up and move back to the U.S.) when he asked why we were going to Costa Rica. Apparently adopting five children at once just isn't normal. Welcome to our out-of-the-box life history. Upon landing in Costa Rica, we made it through immigration (90-day visas obtained), and customs, were claimed by our car rental agency and then whisked out of the airport to pick up our vehicle for the next 47 days.

By the time we reached the car rental HQ's, I was sure of two things: Peter was going to win everyone over with his ability to speak Spanish (with a good accent) as he kept being complemented on it by the Ticos, and he would also be the sole driver of the vehicle in this crazy traffic. Our condo is technically around a 10 minute drive from the airport... but it took us over an hour to get here. On second thought, perhaps the van-driving idiot on our way to Atlanta was just a test run for me to get used to the insanity that is San Jose traffic. Peter and I came to a quick agreement... he watches the road and our fellow drivers (it's a good thing this kind of driving is right up his alley!), and I watch the GPS and tell him when and where to turn. He says if I do well at navigating, I can be his navigator when we do Baja off-road racing after the kids are grown. {wink, wink}

By the time we made it to the condo complex (where there is conveniently a small shopping center with a grocery, a couple of restaurants, a pharmacy, a phone repair store, and an ATM), we were both feeling the effects of our go-go-go from the last week, and were ready to crash. After checking in and picking up groceries and a pizza (excellent, by the way), we brought everything into the condo and literally crashed on a large sofa/bed in the bonus room (later to be used as a third bedroom). Home Sweet Condo.

P.S. Today and tomorrow we'll venture out again, finish unpacking, and see what our little area has to offer. I'm grateful for all of our years overseas, as (so far) nothing has been a shock to the system (other than the fact that they claim you can drink the water from the tap - that's a new one for us!). On Sunday we will meet with our lawyer and her assistant, and on Monday we are scheduled to meet the kids for the first time. It hasn't really sunk in yet, but I'm sure it will soon.

Full to Overflowing

I'm not a people person. Most of the time I find myself quite irritated by people, in fact, and fully identify with Christ in those moments when he got away by Himself to connect with His Father (as documented in the Gospels). However, unlike Christ, I'm not always wise enough to walk away so I can talk to my Father about it, unless it's to pray, "Lord, help me not to blast them. And can You please make them use the brains You gave them?" Let's just say that to "love your neighbor as yourself" does not come naturally for me.

And then people surprise me. Stun me, actually. And those experiences remind me that I am not, in fact, a happy little island (à la Bob Ross), but a part of a wider community of people who ignore me when I'm snippy, irritated, and generally unpleasant to be around, and genuinely care about impacting 5 little strangers from Costa Rica. I find myself "full to overflowing" with gratitude for people who choose to bless us through their generosity towards our kids.

You see, if left to my natural INTJ tendencies, I'd pack up my books (and Peter), move to a Paris apartment, and leave no forwarding address. I'd hide in the middle of a city full of people whose language I cannot speak (makes not talking to people so much easier), walking to the local boulangerie each morning for my daily croissant or baguette, and revel in the introversion of it all. But God didn't put me on this earth to hide, no matter how much I might like to at times. 

There are days - even currently - when I am "full to overflowing" with people who need things from me, and I get worn out. My stress level goes up and my emotions hover right under the surface, just waiting for a reason to be let loose. But a very wise friend reminded me yesterday, "It's all good preparation for when you have 5 little people who need you ALL.THE.TIME." I woke up in the middle of the night thinking about that, and I thanked God for the opportunity to practice now, and for a friend who is willing to say what I need to hear, not just what I want to hear.

Whether I feel up to it or not, as Christians, our purpose on this earth is to be a reflection of the light of Christ, not to hide in our house and hope people go away. Three weeks from today we will be in Costa Rica, settling into our home for the next 6-8 weeks, knowing that in a few days it will never again be just the two of us. For some unfathomable (to us) reason, God has chosen us to be the parents of 5 unique opportunities, entrusting us with their lives to raise with love and for His glory. I don't understand why He picked us - the least likely candidates for the job - but #iamthankful I serve a God who is so much bigger than my self-sufficient, Paris-loving, INTJ, hide-away self. 

I'd be lying if I said it wasn't still overwhelming at times, but we also cannot wait to see how He will continue to write, not only the story of our lives, but of theirs. To GOD be the Glory. 

ADOPTION UPDATES

PRAISE: We booked a car for our stay in Costa Rica - Thanks for Praying!

FINANCES: My YouCaring math was a little off last week (hello - English major!), and we still need around $3400 (extra helps cover the credit card fees from YouCaring) to meet our goal. The account will remain active while we are in country, so gifts during that time would help as well since our income will be decreased. CLICK TO DONATE.

$$$ TRANSPARENCY: We have been paying (and continue to pay) for items for the kids (school, clothing, etc.) and our trip (luggage, toiletries, etc.) out of our personal income, and so far have only pulled from this fund to cover the costs of our 2 airline tickets and the condo payment.  $20k was our estimate of what we would need, and it's probably going to be pretty close when all is said and done (perhaps a little under our final costs). Your monetary gifts have helped SO MUCH - THANK YOU!

CO$T$ COMING UP: We still have to pay for the car (just under $2700), the final agency funds (just over $5300), and 5 one-way tickets home (last estimate was just over $2000, but that could change) + food, gas, immigration, and physicals for the kids in Costa Rica, and travel expenses in the U.S. (car storage, motel). Additionally, everything is currently booked for 6 weeks, but if we find we need to stay longer, there will be additional cost to both the condo and the car.

GRATITUDE: There are only 26 items remaining on our Amazon Registry (CHECK THEM OUT)... WOW!! YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING!!

The LONG Update

"Every time I think of you, I give thanks to my God." Philippians 1:3 (NLT)

Humbled. Blessed. Reminded. Grateful. Whether it's friends ordering books through an online party (which, in turn, gives us free credit for school books), or people buying gifts for our kids (from our Usborne Wish List or Amazon registry), or a check showing up in our mailbox on the very week we book our housing for an exact amount (more on that below), with each event, I find myself feel more and more at a loss for words. If you know me, you know that's not usually a problem (I'm an introvert, but I'm also a Graham, and we're known for our ability to TALK. [or WRITE] A LOT.). But good golly... since February 1st (when we finally told our story to the wider world), Peter and I have been rendered speechless by the generosity of our friends, family, and even online-only acquaintances. 

We are HUMBLED... that you would choose to walk with us in a tangible way.
We are BLESSED... that God has provided needs & wants in ways we could not have imagined.
We are REMINDED... to hold loosely to what He gives us, ready to pass it on when He nudges.
We are GRATEFUL... for the opportunity to see God's hand writing this story, and using those around us.

WE'VE BOOKED A PLACE TO STAY IN COSTA RICA! After some searching, more outreach, and a whole lot of prayer, we've got a place to live while we're in Costa Rica. I'll get to the good stuff, but you need some background first. 

God has been reminding us (again!) that this is HIS story, not ours. Peter and I are both planners by nature. We had a PLAN for our life (and it was a good one)... but God walked in and totally disrupted OUR plan, substituting one that we never would have considered, but which has broken and taught us more than OUR plan ever would have. We had a PLAN for how we were going to pay for the adoption (that was working)... but God came in again and reminded us that the cattle on a thousand hills belongs to HIM, and HE is the one providing for this story (through our jobs - from Him, but also through the generosity of friends, family, and strangers). We had a PLAN for how many children (and what sex) we were going to take... I'm pretty sure God had to either chuckle or shake His head at our stubbornness to let go, and now we have "Little Brother" in the fold. And this week, God took OUR plan for housing and turned it upside down, providing something far better than what we could have imagined. To GOD be the glory, great things HE hath done!

When we found out about our kids in late January, Peter started looking for housing in San Jose. He found a house on the outskirts of town, big yard, nice kitchen, 2 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms - and best of all, within the budget. He contacted the owner and explained the situation to him (coming to adopt, no certain dates yet, etc.), and we marked that one as "done" on our list. No prayer needed - we had it handled! ;) Fast forward to about 3 weeks ago... the lawyer in country decided she wanted to go look at the house in person, and her report on the property told us a few things that we didn't know (like the owner would be in the guest cottage next door - located approximately 4-5 feet from the house where we'd be living). Meh. It would work, but it probably wasn't ideal.

As we prepared to search again, we realized that we needed to seek GOD'S plan for housing, rather than ours. {Yes, we ARE slow to learn!} This time we prayed and asked God to make HIS will clear, to direct us to the right house for our kids and our needs, and to clearly open and close doors as we made decisions. Within 24 hours, Peter found a second house on the northern side of San Jose that claimed to sleep 7, and I found a 3 bedroom condo on the south western side of the city. [Insert theme from "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly" HERE] 

Peter started emailing with the owner of the house he found, while I was connecting with the firm that managed the 7th floor condo. The condo was more than double the price of the original house, but it was situated on a compound that offered a nice playground, 4 swimming pools, a walking/running track/path, and a park with a duck pond, plus 24-hour security and parking. I decided it wouldn't hurt to write and explain the situation and see if they could do any discounts. 

Meanwhile, Peter's emails had netted him a house that was managed by an American who had lived in Costa Rica for over 20 years - a fountain of genuinely helpful information - at $1000 less than the original house we were looking at, and $4700 less than the 7th floor condo. Our initial reaction was that the decision was a no-brainer. My condo was a budget buster, his house was easy on the budget. However, we kept praying and decided we'd wait to hear back from the condo owners to see what they might be able to offer.

The initial response from the condo folks was encouraging. They loved what we were doing and would really like to try to make it work. And so we waited. The next day we received a long email from them again, and this time the contact said she'd found my Twitter account (something I hadn't linked to in our correspondence), and she loved that I was so open about my faith in my Twitter bio. Despite having found a job because of Twitter, and the various connections I've made online in the last few years, I'm still amazed at how God can use something as "silly" as social media, for His glory. 

After a number of emails our hold ups on the condo were what we could afford to pay that was also fair for them (this is how they make a living after all), and the fact that it was on the 7th floor with a balcony. I decided to tackle the 7th floor issue first, and (no surprise - it's God's story), they immediately wrote back to inform us that the also owned a second condo (a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom) on the ground floor with a private outdoor patio and grill. The bad news was that it was booked for some of the time we would need it, but the good news was that the other renters were willing to be moved up to the 7th floor so we could have the ground-level apartment. Well, that was one item off the list!

We continued to pray about both locations, and despite our initial reaction to the house over the condo, the more we learned about the second house (like the fact that it really only slept 6, and one kid would have to sleep in a recliner for 6-8 weeks), the more we felt like God was directing us towards the condo (which, despite being just 2 bedrooms, really did have room to sleep 7 on something that resembled a bed). But budget wise, it just didn't fit. No matter how many pools or playgrounds it offered, we couldn't justify the cost. 

After talking it over, I told Peter what I thought we could afford, and he responded with a number that was $500 higher than mine, and $2700 less than the advertised price. After a nudge from God, we also decided that I should offer my services as a writer/editor to them as a way to barter some of the difference. We sent our offer to the condo folks and then waited. In less than 24 hours, we had an enthusiastic "APPROVED" response, and they took me up on my offer to help with updating their website copy. Win-Win! :) They're excited to be a part of this story God is writing, and we're excited to have a space with so many free options for the kids to run and play and expend energy. 

As an aside: less that 2 hours after receiving confirmation that our condo offer was approved, the owner of the second house wrote to say that he had an American family of 4 who wanted to reserve the house for almost the same amount of time during the same period of time - so even though we had to turn him down, he wasn't out anything. I love that. :) 

And so on Tuesday morning of this week, that was that... or so we thought. All week I've been little bit bothered about that $500 amount that Peter felt like we should add to my original offer amount, but since God had made it so clear that this was the right place for us, and the owners confirmed it with their response that they believed God led us to them, I had to let go and trust that God would take care of the little details... like paying for it. ;) When the mail came yesterday I heard it drop in our box, but forgot to go check it. Last night about 10:30, Peter opened the mailbox and pulled out a personal card from some old family friends. When I opened it, a check fell out. Yep, you guessed it. For $500. 

Tickets to Fly!

In all of our travels, we've always flown Delta whenever it was a possibility, and after doing some research through adoption airfare companies and online, we decided to reach out to them again. Last Friday night I spent over an hour on the phone with three wonderful Delta representatives -shout out to Delta, who need it this week after their technical issues! Working together, they were able to get us a great deal on flexible, round-trip tickets to Costa Rica, waving the change fees if we need to move the return date. Online, these changeable tickets were running a little over $2000/each. After explaining the adoption situation to Delta, we ended up getting both tickets for $1300! We are officially leaving on Thursday, September 29th. 48 days and counting...

NEXT UP: HOUSING. This week we've been focused on figuring out where we want to stay for our 6-8 weeks in San Jose. Back in the spring, Peter found a house that looked really promising in a certain section of the city. It had a nice yard for the kids to play, and would give us some breathing room. This week our in-country representatives went to look at the house and sent us their report, which made us decide to look some more. ;) It wasn't a bad house, but we thought there might be something better out there.

I reached out everywhere - Facebook (so many shared that post or asked their friends - thank you!), church websites, and owners on the HomeAway website. As it turns out, if you go to the owners and explain that you're not coming for vacation but to stay for up to 2 months because you're adopting 5 kids, that changes things. ;) As of this morning we have 2 really good possibilities in different parts of the city, both with pros and cons. BOTTOM LINE: Pray for God given wisdom for us as we make our final decision. Pray that we would have clear direction as to which house to take, that the finances would fit the budget, and that the house would be perfect for the needs of our kids and our time in country. We'll make a final choice in the next few days.

This morning, after we'd prayed for the day and about our current conundrum, Peter left for work and I suddenly recognized the hymn that was playing on the Abiding Radio online channel: What a Friend We Have in Jesus. Immediately the words of the hymn started running through my head:

What a privilege to carry
EVERYTHING to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry
EVERYTHING to God in prayer!

God knows what house/condo we need. He knows what we need financially. He knows how He will provide, and the connections He will make. He knows what the kids need. He knows what we need - even when we don't yet know. What a privilege we have to carry all of our unknowns - and knowns - to our Father in prayer. Take heart... He is in control. #iamthankful

Peace

One morning last week, I realized that for the first time, I felt total peace about the future. From trusting that whatever finances we had would cover our needs, to knowing that whatever came off the registry would be perfect for the kids, I finally acknowledged that not only is God writing our story, but He's covering EVERY aspect of this story - and I could let go. Shortly after I came to this conclusion (hey, I'm slow, but I get there eventually!), God - in His mercy - provided two tangible reminders that He knows our needs, and when I trust Him, He will provide. And even though He didn't have to provide additional confirmation of this, when He did, I chuckled and thanked Him for knowing His control-freak kid. $685 came in within a 24-hour period this week to go toward the adoption (thanks to those who donated, you know who you are!), and three new gifts (books - hooray!) arrived from the registry. #iamthankful

When we were in the early stages of our relationship, Peter and I wrote a lot of letters to each other. In many ways it feels like we're dating all over again - but this time as a couple - as we try to describe our life, our plans, our family, and our home to the kids in written letters that the in-country social worker delivers on her weekly meetings. The kids have asked questions that have made us chuckle ("Will we still be able to eat fruits and vegetables?" ANSWER: YES!), and questions that have made us plan ("What chores will we do?"), and questions that leave us stumped on how to explain ("Where will we go to school and what does the school bus look like?"). Bottom Line: These kids are already challenging us to think outside the box. 

TRAVEL UPDATE: We're in the process of getting airline ticket quotes and working out the details of housing and transportation in country. Looks like the car is going to cost us double what we originally thought, but we've got a couple more options to review and see if we can get that price down a bit before we book anything. 

On a personal note: We are so excited about the prospect of traveling outside of the U.S. again. Its been 2.5 years since we last used our passports (that's 2.5 years too long!), and 8 years since we last lived outside of the U.S. for any length of time, and we have missed it. Of every detail of this process, living in Costa Rica for up to 2 months has been on the bottom of our list of concerns, and actually the bright spot in the planning. Once we get all the details into place (like housing/car, and when we get the kids), we'll focus on what we can learn about Costa Rica during our time there. 

FINALLY, there have been some questions from friends and family about the Zika virus in Costa Rica. Our answer might sound cavalier, but Zika is what it is, and it's not going to deter us from going to get the kids. We'll take what precautions we can to avoid getting it, but having previously lived in malaria-ridden countries (where Peter did contract the disease at one point), we're no strangers to living life where these kinds of illnesses are just a part of the package. If you're so inclined to pray for our protection (and protection for our kids) from getting it (or illnesses of any kind while we're there - dengue, malaria, Zika, amoebas, etc.), we wouldn't say no.